Recently there was a fatal accident in my family that involved the abrupt loss of a brilliant life, my Uncle Mark. The day after Thanksgiving he was hit by a car only moments from home. All of my love goes to everyone left behind during this tragic time.
I think everyone knows, you can’t prepare yourself for things like this. You also can’t prepare for the way your soul reacts. Sadness, grieving, and disbelief seem to be common ground for the emotional slam that comes along with the shock… once that settles… you’re sort of on your own to make your own sense of things and face the other personal affects that I believe change from person to person.
I’m the sort to shut down. Once I feel that I’ve completely internalized, I meditate, fix myself, and slowly resurface. That’s kind of where I’m at right now… it’s the reason I didn’t mention any of this until today.
My spiritual beliefs hold the understanding that death sends out a rippling effect of transformations. Part of these transformations involve an intense time of reflection that sometimes, unfortunately, doesn’t surface until something horrible happens. That, to me, is simply one of those ineffable (unfortunate) human qualities.
And sometimes, when you’re rapidly presented with such shocking extremities… it takes everything you have to steady existence.