ok to not be

November 28, 2014 Posted by gretchen

Namaste blog tribe

FullSizeRender-2 I received an interesting “thank you” email yesterday. Sometimes the cult contacts me and my heart gets all melt-like…

In this particular instance, the person expressed their pleasure at visiting FollowMeToNYC parts because it’s “real”. This is by far the greatest compliment I could receive and I even got a bit teary over my Chai. (more…)

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thanksgiving

November 27, 2014 Posted by gretchen

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone celebrating it today! It’s my sixth Thanksgiving in IMG_5992blog-ville and when I think of how my life has turned inside out during this period, it’s a bit startling.

Five years ago, I celebrated with my whole family nearly. Last year, I was out in Colorado with my best friend of over 30 years. This year, it’s just me, my parents and one of my four siblings.

I guess I should say three siblings, considering how I had to disown one of my sisters over the past two years.

In any event, my number one motivation coming back to the states after a decade away was to be with my parents. So sharing today with them is the blessing that I am most thankful for.

FullSizeRenderIt snowed yesterday. Being in the country is a peaceful retreat compared to my present New York City state of… “I need a job… I need to finish my book… need this, need that.”

All I need to do today is enjoy my parents, my sister and naturally – the puppies.

Nothing repairs me like coming to my parents place. New York City remains a top lover, of course. But the peace I find in Connecticut is something beyond words. The past seven months have been the most challenging I’ve seen since coming back. This shocks me in itself, because after addressing the trauma from my divorce, I really didn’t think things could get out of control again.

I have a companion staying with me in Manhattan to make sure I’m steady on my feet. He is the other element of life I am most thankful for today.

Love to you, yours and ours blog family. I’m thankful for all of you that check in on this journey we share. When I started this so many years back now, who knew where I’d end up. Thank you for being here too. Here’s to countless more blessings. x

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my live living room. laying low.

November 25, 2014 Posted by gretchen

Namaste blog family

IMG_5845The Live in Your Living Room event that occurred in my apartment last Saturday was a tremendous success. It was incredible to see Cloudmachine perform in my apartment four years after I wrote poetry to his music. It was the first time we met in person and an amazing experience all around.

Another surreal aspect of it all was how my life has come full circle. I set off to write professionally in New York City back in 2009, did just that, the gig came to a conclusion, so here I am floating again.

Drifting.

I’ve gotta say meeting someone in person who I came in contact with so early on in my mission was out of this world. There were probably about twenty people in my place at one stage, I think that’s more people than I actually know in total. The musicians IMG_5837brought guests, friends brought friends; it was an incredible event to be part of.

I’ve ducked out of the city again to get some writing done in the country. Focussing can be tricky with the whole, “Jesus, I really need a job”-ness railing the back of my skull – but I’m doing my best. After all, what more can we do.

Something else I’ve come to terms with recently is that during all of my working ventures since I’ve been back in town – the hardest one IMG_5813has been forgiving the ex-husband I left in Australia. Before my divorce, I didn’t really understand what being traumatized meant. And while I understand it and have dealt with it to the best of my ability over the past 36 months, I still haven’t forgiven him.

That’s unfamiliar to me, I might get crabby – but forgiveness is something that’s always come easy before.

I guess part of why it’s on my mind is because I’ve been working so hard these past 38 months, I was able to suppress the final pieces that come with letting go of a big part of your life. I don’t wish it on anyone.

I’m going to write some poems about it and get my posting steady again. I know I can’t feel terrible forever, I just hope it concludes soon.

 

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inter. views.

November 18, 2014 Posted by gretchen

DSCN2429Too long has gone by blog tribe. I wish I had better excuses for my gone-ness. The only excuse I really have is… secrets.

I’ve been crazy busy. Job applying, city running, puppy playing. I’m edgy and excited over where I’ll end up when the next job arrives. Also, I think about my book until it keeps me up at night.

The environment around me remains stunning. I’ve experienced autumn at least three times, traveling up and down the north-east coast. I have DSCN2435had a record period of silence and thoughtfulness.

When every layer of requirement peels away, go here, do this, apply for that, pay us… it usually comes back to book. Book and blah-g actually. Since recording just over five years of existence around here – I’m compelled to clean it in an enriching way that somehow expresses the creative contribution I endeavor to make to Earth, while I’m here.

It feels odd not having a day job. I stay busy and fluttering, awake at 5.30 every morning and what not. It’s just refreshing to experience another style of life for a minute – until I embrace everything changing again.DSCN2432

The concert in my living room for this weekend is still in effect for this Saturday, November 22nd. I’ve been lucid dreaming quite a bit and thinking thoughts of warm places.

I hope you are all well and bathing in light.

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how we law

November 11, 2014 Posted by gretchen

I had many appointments today. I was up down and around New York City. At the end of it, I dipped into a half-price happy hour at 3 Sheets Salon and worked on Book. That was super fun. It’s nearly done… you know?

Book is sexy blog tribe. #justsayin

Last night was my first night back in Manhattan after a lot of days away. David and I immediately collected to catch each other up on stories etc.

And we danced our faces off in my living room to this:


 

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    FollowMeToNYC expresses daily thoughts of Gretchen Cello that tend to change with the tides. Naturally these concepts do not reflect those of her employer... or anyone else you may see her walking down the sidewalk with one day.
 
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