less face kicks

Namaste love tribe I have been sleeping a lot lately.  This isn't sheerly a depression factor - though that has slightly contributed. I lucid dream. I have since I was little. Some people argue this is a conscious activity opposed to dream-state, I've never really heavily invested myself in the debate. I usually dream about lovers. Since my latest kicked my face a bit, I'm trying to put myself into a state of less face kicks. I'm not sure why I...

mind moving

My mind has been on moving over the past week and change. The lease in my midtown tower expires come July, and I'm about to be out. Usually, when it comes to leaving the states - I say, the further the better; which is partially how I ended up in Australia for ten years. My heart exploded in Sperlonga, Italy and is beating on the beach's white sand - waiting for me. Therefore, I'm putting myself on a back-to-Australia-via-Sperlonga itinerary....

ten hour trance. suppression.

I slept for ten hours. From roughly 3pm to 2am. I woke up, phoned a friend, and sooked some more. However, today is Monday. I have things to do at work. I'm eternally grateful for a full-time writing job. It demands that I focus in ways outside of my ordinary thought patterns. I told the team of boys that have been holding me up all weekend that my approach to dealing with this from here forward is in one simple way: suppression. I'm not going...

he didn’t realize

The weekend is passing effectively. It's somehow Sunday morning... I sufficiently cycled another 24 hours of crying and sleeping. In my latest emergency call to David to cry about the luthier; he brought forward a new theory to my present state of disarray. "I don't think he realized..." What David was referring to with the "realize" bit, I believe, are my eccentricities. He reckons that perhaps the luthier didn't realize I'm quite... so......

maestro di crepacuore

Someone told me yesterday that they found my writing to be romantic. My reply was, "I think I'm more of a master of heartbreak..." Maestro di crepacuore. I honestly do believe, after my most recent heart slashing, I'm done. Finnito.  While I appreciate there is quite a particular romance to the utter despair only associated with slaughter of the heart - macellazione cuore - after awhile, I don't think I can take anymore. I feel the worst for...
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