day thirty-two

IMG_5806I have never Skyped so much in my entire life. Tonight, during our second session of the day, the luthier and I pondered how our species ever survived without it.

In a way, it doesn’t feel like we’ve been separate for 32 days. Technology sort of washed that out with text messages and video chat. However, there is absolutely no replacement for the physical touch of your better half.

Italy, I’m about it.

The luthier  is the only person I have ever thought about to the extent that I lose track of time. In a way I lost track of days, which has proven incredibly helpful – because I leave in just five more!

I have not been happy since this blah-g came to life in 2009. At that point, I was at the ass-end of seven year marriage to someone I never spoke to again and consider somewhat of a stranger, in hindsight.

Needless to say, not happy. Then I married another stranger for a month to see if it would get a rise out of my ex-husband, which it didn’t.  So then I had two ex-husbands.

Don’t get me wrong. There has been joy in my life, there’s joy in the blah-g archives, for certain. However, to me, happiness is something very separate from a good time. There was really only one other time I felt it, and it wound up evaporating around me and leaving me in somewhat of a steady sway for a set of years or so. IMG_5809

I feel better. I’m happy for the first time in over ten years, to be completely honest. And that’s because there has always been a love that I believed my life belonged to and who belonged to my life. It’s been a literal focus point of my existence as far back as my mind wants to go.

I’m going to see him in a few days and bring him back to Manhattan.

That was a feral 30-something days, blog tribe. I can’t even tell you.

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