I think about all of the words around here regularly. The world has changed since 2009 and I’ve changed with it in some ways — other ways I’m exactly the same.
I started FollowMeToNYC as a disguise to deal with my divorce after my eight year marriage fell apart. It’s funny looking back because I never really spoke about what set all of this off… it was just “New York City NEW York City NEW YORK CITY!”
Let’s not forget that New York City is my fucking town. For life.
Regardless of anything, this webpage is special to me. Even if I’m not here as much as I used to be.
Not a lot of people know me personally. I don’t really talk to anyone regularly these days. Just my sister, my father and my best friend.
I feel stronger than I ever have. It makes my soul tingle.
My ineffable love for the world doesn’t fade, but human beings have really gone out of their way to try to fuck me over. Unsuccessfully (obvs), but consistently. Hence “tried…”
For this reason, I’ve retreated. And it’s paid off. The only thing that has ever hurt me in life has been a human. That’s nothing jaded or cynical, it’s reality. I feel like most living creatures would probably agree. Sure sometimes a natural disaster comes in and fucks us around.
But for the most part, it’s people.
In three weeks I’m moving to someplace I’ve never even visited. As the virus fucks the world around, I’m still in this small place where I don’t need to wear a mask and hardly anyone has dropped dead.
This doesn’t make me feel great considering the state of the world. However, I’m grateful and amazed for the position I’ve been in.
Separately, in my true gypsy nature, I’m moving. Again.
It will be the seventh time I’ve moved in the past three years.
… you got that?
Buckle up blahg family. I’m still here. I’ve been so quiet, but I have heaps to tell you. I’m thinking of new ways to do that.
Mostly, I’m just living my life. I’m not chasing anything anymore. I’m 42 and I can just independently exist. I don’t rely on anyone. My heart has a shield around it that took about eight years to build.
I’ve decided in 2021 I need to become a multi-millionaire so no one that I love ever has to care about money again.
… let’s see what happens. x o x