Posts Tagged: ‘soul’

when your mouth is

January 15, 2020 Posted by the writer

Super shut.

Observations inside silence are always the loudest to me.

One of my favourite people who hails from the South Island of New Zealand spent a few days in my beach hut recently.

We guzzled gin drinks and played hair colour games with another favourite who dwells down Byron way.

We dipped carrot sticks in garlic dips and swapped secrets and silliness. The colours of my life are violet and gold. They remain that way.

Seven years back two of my best friends killed themselves within nine months of each other. That reality floated past these pages somewhere, right around the time when I shut down.

Considering I keep five friends in my pocket, losing close to 50% of them was something I never tried to accept.

Not until these past few weeks.

When y’all wonder where I went. Inside a broken heart is probably the best excuse I can float you.

I never took a minute to think about it. I’ve been crying a bit recently. I’m finally facing what the fuck my problem is.

Per the recommendation of one of my favourite kiwis, I’m finally starting to dance it off. That’s what the boys would want.

Blast this. You’re welcome.

IF UR LISTENING

January 10, 2020 Posted by the writer

WOAH – OH – OH – OH …

… sing it back woah woah woah

I WAS FEELIN FREE…. WOAH OH OH OH

so

tell. me

what

do i need?

(stumble til you drop)

solitude

January 7, 2020 Posted by the writer

I always say I’m all one way, or all the other.

I did eight years in midtown Manhattan because I wanted to be in it. I needed to be around humans, I wanted the energy of the 24-hour buzz. I was heart broken and lost.

I’ve been back in Australia just over 18 months. It’s not easy doing everything alone. While I can look back on my first marriage and clearly identify why it was utterly fucked, I got really used to being with someone.

I don’t think I’ll ever completely adjust to being by myself. But I always go where my heart speaks to. Australia is my heart. It has been since I first arrived in 2002.

Every morning when the light wakes me up, I go straight to the beach. It’s a 10-minute scoot down the street.

I’m in between jobs, once again. The career I built in Manhattan was unexpected and I feel like the word phenomenal is an understatement.

For the past two months I’ve been simmering. After a decade of grinding whether it was spinning a blahg empire or making in excess of 200K a year at one point (writing, always and only writing…) I reached a point where I knew I had to stop.

As an artist, the emotional tax of relationships is real shit. I keep about five people close, in my pocket close. When two of my pocket tribe took their own lives eight years ago… I never reformed as the person I was.

I believe when it’s said we live like five or six lives in a lifetime. I’m probably embarking on number four at this stage. I’ve got a few freelance gigs that will hopefully give me dollars to get by.

Lily is about to be 13 years old. That’s a lot of dog years. All I want to do at the moment is be with her and Fronkles. I definitely like dogs better than people as a general rule.

I’m putting myself back together after personal things not meant to be slung on the web. However I must say, I’m elated to see how many of you popped up when I came back to this corner again.

I’m making it a priority to check in every day again. Slowly things will unravel and a natural catch up will ensue.

I started this page because I was having a really difficult time in my personal life. I’m back for the same reason. I consider this site a fluid art project and love you all for checking in.

lucid. unplugged. disconnect.

January 12, 2019 Posted by the writer

“Yo puedo hacerte feliz…”

I met my husband 29 June 2017. Halfway through our first date, breakfast at a French cafe’ on east 44th street in midtown Manhattan, he leaned across the table while I blushed crossing and uncrossing my legs (both of us dressed to the New York City nines, suits and frocks at 7am) and he stated, quite plainly in a husky, cigar-smoking Spanish accent that I drank like a green smoothie…

“I can make you happy.”

“… yo puedo hacerte feliz.”

(more…)

mansion life. sun up. sun down.

December 28, 2018 Posted by the writer

Living in a mansion for the past six months has been a new solar system after tucking myself into stacks of midtown Manhattan apartments for eights years.

I have a reading room, a writing room and an outdoor sanctuary for swimming, sun bathing and word spinning. It’s a far cry from my beloved farm house where I was dwelling back in 2009 when FollowMeToNYC took shape.

Lately I’ve been reflecting a lot. When the sun goes up until when it drops. Then I usually float on my back in the pool and the stare at the stars for awhile.

My six months back in Australia have been divine. The past few years have been mind blowing, and as I roll into 2019 to celebrate ten years of this blahg… that’s a whole lot of life that went down.

I’m a firm believer that creatures don’t really change. Experiences differ, so I guess we roll through them as we may, but when it comes to your center to you being YOU – your own unique piece of Us, if you will…. I don’t reckon much changes.

When I started this page I needed a voice after being neglected by an emotionally abusive partner for a couple of years too many. I built a comfy corner and complimented it with social connections and endeavors to grow an audience and interact.

Truth is, I’m not really that type of creature. One of my traits as a born Writer is despising glowing boxes (television, phones, digital everything) and embracing solitude. Finding my own path to wander where I can listen to my inner voice, how I connect with the life I live, and making language paintings remains my one true passion.

I originally came to Australia in 2002 because it’s about as far from New York City as you can get, an entirely different planet to where I’m from. I returned this year for the same reason.

I’m awaiting my husband’s orders which are going to result in me being swooped up and lifted to Western Australia in a literal blink. Yet another new land where I have never lived but always dreamed.

That’s when the next chapter officially starts.

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    FollowMeToNYC is a creative processing ground which expresses individual ideas that often change with the tides. Naturally, these ideas do not reflect those of any of my employers, or anyone else you might see me wandering down the street with one day.
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